Twas the night before Christmas: Psychologist's Parody
Twas the night before Christmas and all through the clinic,
no appointments for the psychologist, not even a cynic...
Security guards were watching their tellies,
eating their pizza and scratching their bellies...
The patients were restrained and snug in their beds,
while visions of delusions were kiboshed by meds...
The doctor pulled an arm through his coat sleeve,
had his gloves on the door handle, was ready to leave...
When down in cell B5160-8,
A voice called, "Please! Let me out! I'll be late!"
Calmly the doctor walked downstairs to see
if he could comfort the man who sent out this plea...
"Good evening, Doc," said the man, with a nod,
"Notice anything at all that strikes you as odd?"
The doctor's thought was not betrayed on his face,
That's something I commonly ask myself in this place...
The good doctor's eyes widened with wonder,
He thought, "Is what I am seeing a cognitive blunder!?"
For standing on the other side of the door,
Stood a white-bearded fellow with a bag on the floor.
This cheerful man was dressed in red top-to-bottom,
except for black boots and white trim of cotton.
Demanded the doctor: "Is this some kind of joke?
"Or has someone been putting the rum in my coke?"
Laughing with a mischievous glint in his eyes,
the alleged Archetype began to analyze...
"You've been a pretty good boy all your life,
and nowadays help folks through anxiety and strife..."
"You're typically clear-headed, centred and calm:
even when you are worried no one catches on..."
"So now, tell me why you think this is delusion,
and why you've come down with decision aversion?"
"Don't you remember? You were a child - I came to see ya!
Or perhaps you suffer from disassociative amnesia?"
The psychologist stood there, paralyzed a moment;
perplexed, confused, withholding formal assessment...
He took a closer look at this gentleman's face;
was suddenly awed by the man's composure and grace.
He leaned in closer still because there was something quite strange
that he wanted to confirm but couldn't tell from this range.
Intuition told the doctor, to make this correct,
he'd need to be closer, to observe more direct...
As the doctor stepped in, things seemed to brighten, expand,
and the Santa Claus Icon extended a hand.
"Congratulations, son!" St. Nick bellowed in delight,
"Now you see who I am, and I'm not such a fright!"
Feeling braver, the doctor accepted the handshake
"Now I'm certain who you are - there is no mistake!"
"This feels like centration, I feel so awake...
It feels like my first birthday, with presents and cake!"
For standing before the doctor was a mirror of himself,
wearing not his business suit, but a big grin and red felt!
With a start the doctor woke up in his workplace,
at his desk, with his books, in his own comfy space.
"Of course!" the doctor stated, "We've all got Christmas Spirit.
We just have to wake up and spread it, not fear it!"
----------------
Obviously when I don't get called in to work I have a lot of time on my hands! LOL So yeah: B5160-8 (which I said was a cell # in this poem: is actually the number on the shirt of Hannibal "The Cannibal" Lector in "Silence of the Lambs.")
And a lot of the terms I got from reading Jung, and some other books... for instance: "centration is a thought pattern common during the beginning of the preoperational stage of cognitive development; characterized by the child's inability to take more than one perceptual factor into account at the same time."
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Wednesday, December 19, 2007
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